{New world, same Brian}

Tonight I made my first meal on my own in Africa. Mac'n'cheese. I know, I know.... you are super impressed right?! :) Well, I was! The kids and Brian really enjoyed it, but I did not really like it. The cheddar cheese here tastes so different, a lot sharper or something. So I just fed them and didn't eat. Well, Brian was going to lock up our home {it is open during the day for the workers to come in and out} and I knew he would be right my favorite restaurant with my favorite meal here. So I asked him ever so sweetly if he would mind stopping and picking it up for me, kind of like a belated birthday present. Of course he agreed. When he walked in from locking up with my food and Coke in hand, I burst out laughing with the thought of how even though we are on the opposite side of the world from our home, some things will never change. Brian is just as amazing of a husband on this continent as he was on the last. Thanks Bri, I love you so much!

{Honestly}

uI feel like it is important for me to write this post. I hope you find it as an open and honest look into my life right now, and a source of encouragement in some way. I can't wait to look back on it in the near future and see how far God has brought me.
We have been in Africa about a week and half now, but it seems like so much longer. It seems so long ago that we were with our friends in the States, in the freezing cold Iowa weather. It seems like forever ago we were at the airport with our loved ones saying goodbye. It has been a much harder transition than I was prepared for. Sure, you have everyone telling you what it is going to be like, and you know hard times full of emotions are coming, but until you walk it out, you have no idea. I have never experienced such sorrow or felt such loss before in my life. It is as though a literal death has occurred, a death of our old lives back in the States. During the day here I do well. We keep busy and honestly with the four kids there is not much time to stop and think. At night though, it is a different story. As I sit in our room while our babies sleep, I become overwhelmed with emotions. I miss our family and friends so deeply it has physically hurt my heart. I want to run away, and run home to the only life we ever knew as a family, living near family and serving at our home church surrounded by our church family. I have questioned God, was this a mistake? We have nothing in the States to go home to. No home, no car, no furniture, no jobs. Did we give that all up to come here and just survive? I want to thrive, not just survive! In my heart though, I know without a doubt we are here for a reason, even if I don't like admitting it. I know we have been called here, and looking back over the last year and remembering all the miracles that got us here, could never deny that. I have been reminded many times of a night back home when we were praying with our dear friends Josh and Alissa, and Josh said he felt like we needed to pray for the hard times. He was telling us he felt like there would be hard times to come but we can do all things through God in us. So that night he prayed for us about that and I have looked back on it and it has been a great source of strength.
I have known since the first night here I was not embracing this call on our lives. I have been stiff arming the call and our lives here since I got here. It scares me when I think about embracing the call and being ok, and beginning our lives here, because in reality that means being ok with giving up our lives in the States. God has been speaking to me though, even just this morning. He has been using our friends here to assure me that all these feelings are normal. This morning, as hard as it was for me to say I did tell God, I accept this. I KNOW you have our family here for a reason. Even though I miss our family and friends, and ministries back in the States terribly, I submit to what you have for us here. I don't want to be here and not be used. I don't want to wallow in my sorrow any longer. It is not a fun or healthy place to be. I trust that even a couple months from now I will look back at this time I my life and say Praise God for bringing me through that tough time!

Psalm 9:9-10 "The Lord also will be a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in time of trouble, and those who know thy name will put their trust in thee; for thou oh Lord, has not forsaken those who seek Him."

Romans 8:18 "For I consider that the suffering of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us."

Matthew 11:28-30 "Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you shall find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy, and My load is light."


I know as our home gets finished and we get accustomed to life here, things will start feeling more normal. There is so much culture shock still going on daily. Driving here is crazy, and we actually got in a minor car accident the other day while Brian was driving. We saw favor even in that situation though, as there was no damage on the car that hit us {even though the accident was our fault}, and the man was only concerned that we were ok and didn't even want to exchange phone numbers or anything. Our friend told us that is not common at all! We have some minimum damage on our car, but nothing that cannot be fixed.
Funny story about things that happen here and we laugh about later. The other night Brian got home from basketball with some other missionary men and it was about 11 at night. We were having a serious conversation as I was upset and missing home, and praying together. All of a sudden it sounded like someone threw a baseball as hard as they could right at us in our guest house we are staying in. It startled both Brian and I very much and we both became very nervous, as no one else should have been on the property at night. Brian jumped up and grabbed his knife and called Peter {our friend we are staying with right now} to see what he should do. Then I got a text from Mary {Peter's wife} saying a mango had just fallen on our roof and that was the sound. Brian and I got a good laugh about it. Small things that if you don't know can startle you, but then once explained are no big deal. I have a lot of those stories.  :) :)
Well... if you made it through this entire post GOOD JOB! We love you all and are so thankful for your prayers and encouragement! Much love from Tanzania!!

{My daughter is becoming African}

Who can guess what my little Sopheroo is holding in this photo?

 

 

If you guessed the queen termite from one of the termite mounds dug up at our new home.... you are RIGHT! {but I doubt that's what you guessed} :) I think she is becoming African already!

 

 

 

 



{{Getting Settled In}}

We have been in Tanzania for five days now and are  getting adjusted. The older three kids slept through almost the entire night last night, while Harper was awake for a small part of it. Other than that we are trusting tonight will be the first night we all beat jet lag and get a full nights sleep. The first three nights were very hard for me to sleep at night, as worry would creep into my mind, and I am sure jet lag played a part into it as well. Both Brian and I have been praying that I would be able to sleep at night, and praise God last night I slept through almost the entire night! It felt wonderful to wake up after being in a deep sleep!

The kids had their first day of school today, which we also think will help them sleep through the night and get on a normal schedule. Soph started preschool, Emmersyn is in kindergarten, and Kayden is thrilled to have started first grade and have a class of all boys and one girl. They are attending an international school that some missionaries started here just a few months ago, Their classes are smaller and the kids have all met and love their new teachers. Lice is a big problem at the school right now, last week they even had to cancel school one day because it had gotten so out of control. So today Kayden's teacher wasn't there because she was at home being on the tail end of having lice. The girls only go a half day and Kayden stays for a full day. Kayden is also the only student there who brings his own lunch, while everyone else just eats what the school prepares, but he has done so much adjusting right now I figure that I would give him some time to adjust to that.

 



 

I have been {somewhat} learning how to cook and the other night our friends we are staying with made spaghetti and the kids all loved it! Victories like that bring such JOY to this Mommy's heart!! Food I would say is the biggest struggle with the kids. I am finding things that they like though, and working with it.
We got to see our house yesterday! There is much work to be done with it, but we see a lot of potential and are very excited to start working on it! I cannot wait to put pictures up of the before and after. The kids kept running around saying how much the loved it and were so excited to move in.

Brian got to drive for the first time since us being here today! Exciting and scary! :) You drive on the opposite side of the road here, sitting in what would be the passenger seat in the States, plus we have to learn stick, which neither Brian or I have ever driven before, I wasn't with him, but heard he did a great job. You have to be very aggressive to drive here, especially in town. It is crazy! There are cars flying everywhere, and then just random people everywhere. One of our friends here told me it is like playing a video game. Very true!

Thank you all for your prayers and kind words and emails of encouragement. They have brought such joy and encouragement to our hearts! God has been working in my heart and teaching me to trust Him in ways I have never had to before. It is good, great even, but hurts some nonetheless.
There is such joy in knowing that we are walking out the specific call God has given our family. Be encouraged if you feel like God has placed a dream or a promise into your heart that you have not yet seen come to pass. I look over the last seven years and then close my eyes and hear the sounds and smell the smells of Africa, and am reminded that my God keeps His promises. I find such joy, hope, and peace in that. We have victory in Christ! I so desire to walk in that truth daily.

We are here!!

So I am thinking it was way too ambitious of me to tell people I was going to try to blog every day for the first year. I will, however, try to update at least once a week. If you aren't already a follower please become one! I love seeing who is reading my posts. So since my brain is a little overloaded right now I am just going to type what comes to my mind, and it may be out of order, so try to follow along. :)

Our trip getting here was so much better than I could have ever hoped! The kids did AMAZING! I am so proud of them. They have had so much change over these last few months and are just taking it in stride. Harper slept almost both 9 hour flights and then slept like a champ once we got to where we are staying in Africa. Harper did get sick twice on one plane ride with motion sickness and then when we landed in Tanzania, Sophee got sick from motion sickness as well. Other than that we had no issues and were so happy with how the kids behaved. At every single layover the Lord provided a man from each flight that offered to help us get our luggage to our next terminal. That may not seem like a big deal, but it was huge! We literally would not have been able to get from place to place without people helping us. Once again, He completely provided for us! Once we landed in Tanzania it took a while to get all of bins and luggage. Once we got everything we were some of the last people in the airport, which is not a good thing heading to customs. We got to customs and they wanted to look through most of our bins, and were questioning why we brought such and such things, and were talking about how much they were going to charge us. I just kept praying for the Holy Spirit to move and give us favor. It had been about 20 minutes and it did not look good. The head of customs asked Brian to head back to his office with him, which we had specifically been told not to do by one of our friends in Africa. Brian said that no he wasn't going to do that and could we please just go, we were very tired and needed to go with the kids. The guys with customs talked some more and then literally out of nowhere said that we were ok to go with all of our things. Brian and I both started crying with such joy and relief that the whole process was over. If they had charged us the "duty" they were talking about we could have been charged 100% of everything we had brought into TZ. Praise God we got through with favor!! Our friends were waiting for us once we got out from customs and they helped us load all our things up quickly, and we headed to our friends home where we will be staying the next few weeks while we work on getting our home ready to move in.

We have been transitioning a lot over the last there days. The first full day here was very hard for me and the kids, mostly Kayden. The kids did not want to eat anything at all the first day we were here, and I mean nothing. Brian and I spent some time that night praying with and talking with Kayden about the move, which seemed to help a lot. That night though they all got good sleep and the next day Kayden was back to his normal self and they all ate great. Today there a lot of sickies. Sophee threw up and the family we are staying with has three people throwing up. None of us are sure excactley what it is, but praying it passes quickly. Being sick is never fun, but being sick in this heat is definitely not fun! :) We went to the kid's new school yesterday and they all got to meet their teachers and see their classrooms. They loved it and will be starting school on Monday. Soph will even be starting preschool here, and she is thrilled!

We will be seeing our home either today or tomorrow for the first time, so we are very excited about that! We will be working on it the next few weeks before we move in. Some of the things we will be doing are painting, deep deep cleaning, knocking out some walls, and building shelves and such. We are so excited to make it our home and get settled. Mid April is when we head to language school in Arusha for three weeks, and once we are back from there that is when we are planning on moving in.

Overall I would say we are transitioning fairly well. It is definitely a little bit more overwhelming than I thought it would be. We have to learn a new language, learn a new way of driving, a new way of shopping, a new culture, beat off jet lag, and so on and so on. I am realizing that taking it day by day is what I am needing to do. It is too much to look even a couple days out. It brings so much peace and comfort looking over the past year and seeing/recognizing the mountains the God moved for us to be here, and knowing this is our new home. I am hourly praying for more joy and more patience to be the best Mom to my kids as they are transitioning as well, and the best wife I can be to my wonderful husband. We feel so blessed that this is the call we get to walk out and can't wait to love on the people here.

Prayer Request would be as follows
*for the kids to have victory of this jet lag. Last night they were all up from about 1-5 in the morning which is hard on Brian and I the next day.
*the kids starting school on Monday, that they would feel at peace and have an easy time making friends.
*supernatural joy, love, and peace for our entire family.


We love you all so much! Thanks for keeping up with and praying for our family!

Looking back on 2012...and to 2013.

What an amazing year 2012 was for the Loudermilk family! I could have never fathomed on January 1st,{2012}, that our family would be where we are now, exactly one year later. It seems so surreal to me as I look across the street, from the living room in my parent's home, to the front of our old house, and think over all that happened this year. I want to do a quick recap so that I never forget, even though I am pretty sure I never could!! Over the past year we have traveled to Ohio, Florida, and North Carolina to see family, go on awesome vacations with family, and spend time with our missions agency. We have moved from our home, to our mobile home, and finally into my parents home, which is where we are now. {side note... our whole family of 6 is living in my old room that I lived in while under my parents roof. it is so bizarre at night to look around and see our precious sleeping family, and think of the nights I spent there before ever even meeting Brian. so surreal and so blown away by the blessings I have received.} We have watched our two oldest "babies" start all day school and watch them flourish. We have spent way too many hours at the "shot doctor" and shed many tears because of it. We have gone from wondering when we would feel the Lord release us into the roles of missionaries to Tanzania, to being {almost} fully funded and leaving in 50 days!! We have been blown away watching God open doors for us and moving mountains time and time again. We have been blessed with new relationships, and realized {even more than we already knew!} how blessed we are to be surrounded by amazing people daily. It has been hard, and not always pretty. We have seen chapters of our lives close, and we are beginning to see new chapters begin. Doing all of this with four {young} kid has been interesting. I am so proud of them, though. With all the change going on around us, they just keep going, unphased. The only complaints we have heard from them through all of this is that they hate getting their shots.
As we look to 2013 there is so much anticipation and excitement in my heart! A quick glimpse into what our lives will look like during the next few months are as follows. January to mid-February we will be finishing up packing, and all of the last minute things before getting ready to leave. As of January 1st, Brian is off staff at our home church, and will be done at his secular job late January. There are lots of little things to be done before we go, they just keep seeming to pop up everywhere! February 19, we will fly out of Des Moines and make the long haul to Africa. Once there we will be living with our dear friends {and fellow missionaries} for the next few weeks. While living with them we will adjust to life there, with things like learning how to drive a stick shift while driving on the opposite side of the road, sitting in the opposite seat in the front. Then after being there for a few weeks, we will head to a nearby town and attend an intense three week language school. We will live at the school those three weeks, and the older three kids will go to a "kindergarten" class at the school, while Harper will have her own nanny for the three weeks. After our time there, we will be moving into our house and focus on making it our home. We cannot wait to get settled and start our ministries there. We would so appreciate your prayers for our family during this season of transition. We are excited to see what 2013 brings!

What I meant to say.....

Yesterday Brian and I had the privilege of speaking at our home church and tell them all the amazing things going on with us and Africa. I really had it on my heart that I wanted to share some things, but was super nervous seeing as I DREAD being in front of people. So I figured out what I wanted to share, practiced it in my mind (lots!!), prayed and just trusted I would get my point across. Sunday morning during worship Brian looks over at me and I can see the excitement in his eyes. He says, "Aren't you SO excited?!" I say, "No, I am pretty sure I am about to throw up." (Which was a very true statement.) Then, the time comes for us to get up on stage. I climb the stairs and look at our church family... and my mind goes blank. I mean blank as blank can be. I start talking. I talk for maybe five minutes and then sit down. I honestly do not know what I said. I know I read a couple of verses I had planned, but other than that I literally do not know what words came out of my mouth. Public speaking is just one of the many areas God is stretching me in and showing me I need to put my total trust in Him with. I am a work in progress. :)
So this morning I was thinking about yesterday and a little sad honestly because there were some things I had wanted to say (maybe I did say them yesterday, maybe I didn't... not sure) and the thought came to mind to blog about it. So this is my post about what I meant to say yesterday during our service at Real Life Church.

2 Corinthians 12:9 ... But he said to me, " My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weakness, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

This verse has been such a source of strength for me over the last few months. I have found it is one thing to say to God, "Lord I give you my life, where you lead I will follow!" and to really mean it. The Lord first whispered so gently in my heart seven years ago the promise that my family was to serve the people of Africa, but at the moment I could have never fathomed what it would look like. I was just a small town Iowa girl who had a wonderful and comfortable life. We were young, in love, new parents, homeowners, living across the street from my parents, in the ministry, and it seemed like our lives were right on track and could not get any better. It never really occurred to me that following the call to Africa would mean laying down almost every comfort I had ever known so far in life. Over that last few months I have had a (small) glimpse of what I believe that Bible is talking about when it talks about denying ourselves and taking up our cross daily to follow Christ. It has been painful at times. One of the more painful things for me definitely was selling our home. We moved in there when I was pregnant with Kayden. It was right across the street from my parents and in a neighborhood I had grown up in and loved. We had so many amazing times in that house, and to me it symbolized a place of comfort and stability. I did not realize how tight of a grip I had on moving out of our home until it actually happened. It was a hard process for me. We spend alot of time over at my parents house and it took a good couple of months for me to be able to go to their house without crying every time I would see our old home. It was so many emotions. I was so thankful our house had sold, that God had provided the perfect couple to purchase it and relieve us of the huge burden of selling it, but at the same time it was me having to let go of the "American dream" I had for my family, and letting go of such a huge comfort in our lives. God was so faithful (as He always is!) and over time I was able to move on from the sadness and move into the emotions of complete joy and thankfulness and PEACE, knowing we were walking out God's will for our lives.
Since we have moved into our mobile home and things have really quickly started to take off with us getting to Africa, I find dying to myself is the only way to truly be free. It is painful and not pretty. I am so weak, but He is so strong. He is such a resting place, a strong tower. To say the least, I am not an adventurous person. So to be walking out the call of a missionary to Africa is completely new and uncomfortable to me, but at the same time it feels so natural and so perfectly right. The most common question we get asked is, "Aren't you scared? You are taking ALL of your children over there?" It really is mind blowing to me to be able to say that NO, I am not afraid. I used to be, but God has poured out His peace that's surpasses all understanding over me, and now I am not. Brian and I walk in confidence, knowing that Christ has called us to Tanzania. What else could we possibly do but follow where He leads us?
This is just a little look at what is going on in my heart and what I am learning through this season of our lives. Our family appreciates your prayers more than we can say! We are so blessed.