2014

2014

Monday, December 31, 2012

Looking back on 2012...and to 2013.

What an amazing year 2012 was for the Loudermilk family! I could have never fathomed on January 1st,{2012}, that our family would be where we are now, exactly one year later. It seems so surreal to me as I look across the street, from the living room in my parent's home, to the front of our old house, and think over all that happened this year. I want to do a quick recap so that I never forget, even though I am pretty sure I never could!! Over the past year we have traveled to Ohio, Florida, and North Carolina to see family, go on awesome vacations with family, and spend time with our missions agency. We have moved from our home, to our mobile home, and finally into my parents home, which is where we are now. {side note... our whole family of 6 is living in my old room that I lived in while under my parents roof. it is so bizarre at night to look around and see our precious sleeping family, and think of the nights I spent there before ever even meeting Brian. so surreal and so blown away by the blessings I have received.} We have watched our two oldest "babies" start all day school and watch them flourish. We have spent way too many hours at the "shot doctor" and shed many tears because of it. We have gone from wondering when we would feel the Lord release us into the roles of missionaries to Tanzania, to being {almost} fully funded and leaving in 50 days!! We have been blown away watching God open doors for us and moving mountains time and time again. We have been blessed with new relationships, and realized {even more than we already knew!} how blessed we are to be surrounded by amazing people daily. It has been hard, and not always pretty. We have seen chapters of our lives close, and we are beginning to see new chapters begin. Doing all of this with four {young} kid has been interesting. I am so proud of them, though. With all the change going on around us, they just keep going, unphased. The only complaints we have heard from them through all of this is that they hate getting their shots.
As we look to 2013 there is so much anticipation and excitement in my heart! A quick glimpse into what our lives will look like during the next few months are as follows. January to mid-February we will be finishing up packing, and all of the last minute things before getting ready to leave. As of January 1st, Brian is off staff at our home church, and will be done at his secular job late January. There are lots of little things to be done before we go, they just keep seeming to pop up everywhere! February 19, we will fly out of Des Moines and make the long haul to Africa. Once there we will be living with our dear friends {and fellow missionaries} for the next few weeks. While living with them we will adjust to life there, with things like learning how to drive a stick shift while driving on the opposite side of the road, sitting in the opposite seat in the front. Then after being there for a few weeks, we will head to a nearby town and attend an intense three week language school. We will live at the school those three weeks, and the older three kids will go to a "kindergarten" class at the school, while Harper will have her own nanny for the three weeks. After our time there, we will be moving into our house and focus on making it our home. We cannot wait to get settled and start our ministries there. We would so appreciate your prayers for our family during this season of transition. We are excited to see what 2013 brings!

Monday, October 29, 2012

What I meant to say.....

Yesterday Brian and I had the privilege of speaking at our home church and tell them all the amazing things going on with us and Africa. I really had it on my heart that I wanted to share some things, but was super nervous seeing as I DREAD being in front of people. So I figured out what I wanted to share, practiced it in my mind (lots!!), prayed and just trusted I would get my point across. Sunday morning during worship Brian looks over at me and I can see the excitement in his eyes. He says, "Aren't you SO excited?!" I say, "No, I am pretty sure I am about to throw up." (Which was a very true statement.) Then, the time comes for us to get up on stage. I climb the stairs and look at our church family... and my mind goes blank. I mean blank as blank can be. I start talking. I talk for maybe five minutes and then sit down. I honestly do not know what I said. I know I read a couple of verses I had planned, but other than that I literally do not know what words came out of my mouth. Public speaking is just one of the many areas God is stretching me in and showing me I need to put my total trust in Him with. I am a work in progress. :)
So this morning I was thinking about yesterday and a little sad honestly because there were some things I had wanted to say (maybe I did say them yesterday, maybe I didn't... not sure) and the thought came to mind to blog about it. So this is my post about what I meant to say yesterday during our service at Real Life Church.

2 Corinthians 12:9 ... But he said to me, " My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weakness, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

This verse has been such a source of strength for me over the last few months. I have found it is one thing to say to God, "Lord I give you my life, where you lead I will follow!" and to really mean it. The Lord first whispered so gently in my heart seven years ago the promise that my family was to serve the people of Africa, but at the moment I could have never fathomed what it would look like. I was just a small town Iowa girl who had a wonderful and comfortable life. We were young, in love, new parents, homeowners, living across the street from my parents, in the ministry, and it seemed like our lives were right on track and could not get any better. It never really occurred to me that following the call to Africa would mean laying down almost every comfort I had ever known so far in life. Over that last few months I have had a (small) glimpse of what I believe that Bible is talking about when it talks about denying ourselves and taking up our cross daily to follow Christ. It has been painful at times. One of the more painful things for me definitely was selling our home. We moved in there when I was pregnant with Kayden. It was right across the street from my parents and in a neighborhood I had grown up in and loved. We had so many amazing times in that house, and to me it symbolized a place of comfort and stability. I did not realize how tight of a grip I had on moving out of our home until it actually happened. It was a hard process for me. We spend alot of time over at my parents house and it took a good couple of months for me to be able to go to their house without crying every time I would see our old home. It was so many emotions. I was so thankful our house had sold, that God had provided the perfect couple to purchase it and relieve us of the huge burden of selling it, but at the same time it was me having to let go of the "American dream" I had for my family, and letting go of such a huge comfort in our lives. God was so faithful (as He always is!) and over time I was able to move on from the sadness and move into the emotions of complete joy and thankfulness and PEACE, knowing we were walking out God's will for our lives.
Since we have moved into our mobile home and things have really quickly started to take off with us getting to Africa, I find dying to myself is the only way to truly be free. It is painful and not pretty. I am so weak, but He is so strong. He is such a resting place, a strong tower. To say the least, I am not an adventurous person. So to be walking out the call of a missionary to Africa is completely new and uncomfortable to me, but at the same time it feels so natural and so perfectly right. The most common question we get asked is, "Aren't you scared? You are taking ALL of your children over there?" It really is mind blowing to me to be able to say that NO, I am not afraid. I used to be, but God has poured out His peace that's surpasses all understanding over me, and now I am not. Brian and I walk in confidence, knowing that Christ has called us to Tanzania. What else could we possibly do but follow where He leads us?
This is just a little look at what is going on in my heart and what I am learning through this season of our lives. Our family appreciates your prayers more than we can say! We are so blessed.

Monday, August 27, 2012

LIfe lately :)

As I was sitting down to write this post the hymn came to mind "Great is Thy Faithfulness", in particular the verse, "all I have needed Thy hand hath provided, great is Thy faithfulness, Lord unto thee." I have been wanting to write a post now for like a month, but never do in fear that what I am wanting to say will not come across as I hope. But I will try anyways. :) Life has been a crazy blur in the Loudermilk household lately! A couple weeks ago we made a trip to Ohio to visit all of our family there and had a few speaking engagements where we had the privilege of sharing our hearts for Africa. We had a great time and our time there flew! The day after we got back from Ohio, our two oldest "babies" started kindergarten! I am still in shock that we have TWO children in school. Kayden and Emmersyn are having a blast at school, and we feel very blessed by the teachers they have. It has been so fun to see them so excited about going, and Brian and I both agree that they both seem so much older since they started. They are so proud of what they are doing and learning and are loving making new friends. We are so proud of them! With the older two gone at school during the day, it has been much quieter in the mobile home during the day! It is interesting to see how Sophee and Harper's roles change when the older two are gone. So that is kind of a quick update with what has been happening on the home front here.
I wish I could put into words all that has been happening inside my heart over the past couple of months. We have been BLOWN AWAY by how God is providing and paving the way for our family. The peace I feel in my heart is so heavy and so real, it is almost as though I could touch it. So much has changed in our lives over the past four months, and it amazing to look back and see how God orchestrated all of it. Sometimes it is hard to see when we are right in the middle of something, how it is going to play out. This journey of our family getting to Africa has been a long one, about six years ago is when I felt the Lord first tell me we would be serving in Africa as missionaries. At some times it seemed utterly impossible, and so far off it would create a sense of defeat in my heart and mind. Now that we are oh.so. close, it is truly amazing looking back. God has been so faithful and such a gentle and loving Father throughout the whole process. There really is SO much peace and joy in this chapter of our lives, as we prepare to head out to the field. I feel like one of the biggest things I am learning right now is the joy of obedience. If you would look at our family from a worldly view, you might honestly think we were crazy. Selling our home, moving to a mobile home, selling our possessions in order to take our four kids to a third world country... so on and so forth. We have NEVER been happier though!!! That is what is so amazing to me!!!! When we follow the call on our lives, (and it is different for every single one of us), there is truly joy unspeakable!! I love thinking of my family and friends and seeing all the different callings they have on their lives. They all have different passions and gifting and seeing them walk them out is amazing. It (most of the time) seems so easy and just comes natural because that is what they were created for. That is how we feel with Africa. It is always so funny to hear people's reactions about us moving there, mostly the shock you can see on their faces. But for our family, this feels natural. I tried fighting it and denying it for awhile, and felt incomplete. Africa truly is our fifth child and it feels as though that baby is about to be born. The anticipation leading up to the "due date" (or also known as our launch date) is more than I can handle sometimes. Although it is hard to think about leaving our friends and family here, we become giddy when we talk about living there. Knowing that our lives are going to be changing in such a drastic way in the next few months, and also knowing there will be challenges along they way, but having peace that truly surpasses all understanding is amazing. There is no where else we would rather be right now. Sometimes at night when laying in bed, and looking around our room in the mobile home, I will become overcome with thankfulness and amazement at how God is taking care of our every single need. Needs that we weren't even aware that we had, and yet He still provided for them!
Brian and I were talking the other day of how the time is going to FLY before we leave. September is almost already here and my parents are taking our family to Florida for vacation for a week, and then my sister and nieces will be coming to Iowa for a week as well, so I know that month will go by so quickly! Then you have October, November, and December which will include all the holidays, our (9th!!) anniversary, family visiting from Ohio, trips for our family, and just the ever day business of life! Then January, Brian will be off staff of our church, the new year and preparing all the last minute details of us leaving, and then February is here, and (Lord willing) we will be gone! Crazy!!
There is also so more exciting news we have, but you will have to wait until our next couple of newsletters to hear about! So if you don't receive our newsletter and would like to, get me your address and will add you to our list. Thank you all so much for your prayers, as our family feels totally covered in them during this season. If you have any interest at all in joining our monthly support team please contact us at brokenforafrica@yahoo.com. We can guarantee it will be a worthy investment!

Thursday, July 5, 2012

Heart Change

There has been a heart change going on in me lately. Since I always want to remember this time in our lives, I am going to try to put it out on paper. Our journey to Africa has been a long one. :) Praise God that His timing is always perfect though! The most amazing thing has been going on lately in my heart. One one hand, I have always been excited about going to Africa. There is an undeniable call in my heart to go and serve the people there, as well as a deep love and compassion for them. On the other hand though, it is one thing to say you are willing to go and a completely different thing to actually mean it in the depths of your heart. Since we moved out of our house a couple of months ago, there have been some hard moments for me. Just missing the house, missing living across the street from my parents, missing having a "home", missing what felt like a normal life. It is a very odd way of living when you know you are going to be moving to another country in a few months. Certain things in the past have made me pretty sad. Holidays especially were hard. Knowing they would probably be our last in the States for awhile, things like that. Just a bittersweet way of living, I guess. So, while I was very excited about going, there was still a little bit of me wanting to be attached to our lives here, that didn't want to let go. I am so thankful though, as I see the Grace of God covering that area in my life. Yesterday was the 4th of July. This is one of my absolute favorite holidays. Love everything about it. So, (even though I am embarrassed to admit it), I was a little nervous that I would be a little sad most of the day. Was I ever wrong! Yesterday was one of the best days of my life! Starting Tuesday night we have been surrounded by family and dear friends that we love and cherish, eating and cooking out, playing games and just being together. I don't think even once I though, "Poor me. Having to give all this up.". It wasn't until last night we were at some fireworks and I overheard one of my friends say to another how she was so excited that they were going to start coming back to these fireworks every year together now. And you know what? With excitement I thought about how we would be celebrating the 4th in Africa next year! That is huge for me! Now, please don't take what I am saying as I am not excited about going to Africa. It is not that at all. I am talking about the secret place in my heart, that place where only God can see, and that HE is working on it and I see it happening! It is very exciting for me. I can literally feel the change happening, and there is so much anticipation building up for us to get there, and at the same time savoring all of our moments while we are still here. It is wonderful and I feel so blessed.

Thursday, May 31, 2012

Update!!

Oh man... it seems overwhelming to even start writing this post, in fear that I might turn it into a short novel since I have so much I want to write about. I do fully intend to (for real this time!!) start keeping up with this blog as a way for people to keep up with our lives in between our newsletters. Here is a quick (OK ... probably looong) recap of what has been going on with us.
Probably about a year ago we (Brian and I) had decided to put the brakes on raising funds to get to Africa. We still knew the call was there, but were uncertain about the timing. I had made the mistake of letting fear creep into my heart. It was ugly and it overtook me. I just felt like it was too overwhelming for me to even imagine taking our four kids to a third world country, away from everything the knew.... what about the heat? the bugs? the diseases? would they be angry at us for taking them away from all their family and friends? .... and so on and so on. Fear and worry are ugly things, and once I let them get a foot in the door of my heart, they kicked that door down and overtook the place. Also, a big problem we had, we were unable to sell our home. We had been trying for about four years off and on to sell it and nothing was happening. Sure, we had alot of people come look, but that was it. We felt like we tried everything. We used a couple different realtors, put it up for sale by owner, had a church work day and were extremely blessed by our church family coming and help fix it up. Nothing. It was a little disheartening to see our dreams and have the mountain of our house in the way. So we just decided to put everything on hold for awhile, and focus completely on the ministries we were pouring into at the time here.
For a little while, everything was good. A couple months later though, the restlessness began again. It still amazes me, the desire to be in Africa. We are so happy doing what we do here. We really feel like we have the most amazing life. We love our church, our family is close, our friends, our ministry. Yet, our hearts are daily drawn to more. We decided we would just pray about it and seek the Lord's timing for our family. A few months later, the longing in my heart ( to be in Africa) one day was deep, it was more than I wanted to handle. I told God I didn't understand why we felt such a desire to serve as missionaries, but yet there seemed to be no way. Why wouldn't our house sell? When would the desires of our hearts be granted? As funny as it seems, I felt the Lord tell me to put something on facebook seeing if anyone wanted to buy or rent our home. That day a friend from church called and said that her son and his wife were interested and wanted to come look at the house. I called Brian SO excited!!! The couple came and looked at our house that night, and within about 2 months from then we were moved out and they were moved in! :) Just like that. It really was so easy, and we felt that God was saying, " I am paving the way... now is the time." People would ask us... where are you guys going to live when you move? We would always be like... that's a good question! We really had no clue! We were just completely trusting God that He would provide the perfect place for us, and of course He did! About 4 weeks before we had to be out of our house my Mom found a mobile home online that was perfect for our family. Such small details that God takes care of that make us feel so loved. So we packed up and moved into our new home. We feel so incredibly blessed to be living where we are.
We felt in our hearts that it was time again for us to start back up with raising funds and GET TO AFRICA!! We met with our Pastors, then our deacon board, also flew to North Carolina to meet with our missions agency (FIRE International). Everything is really coming together so perfectly, we fully trust God is in control, and now IS the time for our family. We are experiencing so much JOY in this journey, and growing along the way.
Our church is beginning to phase Brian out of his roles as youth and children's pastor. His last official day will be December 31st. Brian has been on staff at our church for the past seven years,and we love love love what we do there, and this is definitely a bittersweet transition for us. We have peace in knowing we are doing what we are called to though, and look forward to the future.
I think I will cut myself off here. If you made it through all of that, way to go! :) If you are not an official"follower" of this blog... please become one! And feel free to leave comments! :)
Please pray for us as we are really pressing in to get our monthly support raised. We have been very blessed and have almost all of our start up costs (which is a MIRACLE!!), and now really need to focus on the monthly support. In my next post I will share with you what we will be doing as soon as we reach Tanzania. If you are interested at all in supporting us in any way, please contact me and I will be happy to let you know how.
Blessings!!