{ONE month!!}

I can hardly believe it has been one month since we first arrived in Tanzania, and what a huge difference a month can make! The first couple of weeks here were hard, and I would even say hard is an understatement. :) I am so thrilled to say though that I have seen and experienced God's grace and peace in such a deep way over these past couple of weeks. Once I worked up the courage to fully submit myself to His will for my life here in Africa, everything started to change. I was able to sleep soundly and on my own at night {I had been taking sleeping pills to help me the first few days}, joy and laughter were making appearances in my life again, my heart was open to be excited about the work we will be doing here, I started embracing relationships with new friends here, and so on and so on. I feel like a completely different person than the girl that was here the first night. I am SO thankful to be on the other end of that first major transition of adjusting here! I am realizing {even daily still} that just because our family is here, in Africa, doesn't mean we lost our family and friends back in the States. Those relationships will always be there, and it has been amazing to see them even deepen with us being here. Even typing this my eyes are full of tears of thankfulness, as I am truly amazed at the work He has done in my heart. He is such a good and loving Heavenly Father.
This past month has flown by! It has obviously been a month of adjusting for our family. Our older three children are attending a school here called Hope International. The school has been such a blessing to our family and the kids are loving it there! Sophee and Emmersyn attend for a half day {this year} and Kayden is in school for the full school day. They are all thriving and making new friends here. It is such a blessing as their Mommy to see them doing so well, and fitting right into their new lives here. I am so proud of them. They struggled with the food when we first got here, but we are finding things that everyone likes, and they are doing much better now. Our little Harper Praise is LOVING it here. I could have never even imagined how much she would enjoy being here. She loves to play outside all day, and loves here one on one time with Mommy while the older three are at school. We found a play group with a lot of children her age and have gone one time, and she really enjoyed it. The only thing Harper isn't super crazy about is that when we are out in public the Tanzanians will just come up and try to grab her right out of my hands. It is just a cultural thing here, but she wants nothing to do with it. She has learned to stiffen her arms up so they can't grab her, and they get the point.
Brian has been asked to lead chapel at the kids school every week, and is very excited about it. I often wondered  why God would take Brian out of his youth and children's position at our church, when that was so obviously one of his major gifts, but doors are opening here for him to just jump right back into working with youth. I love seeing him in his element, working with precious children. He has also had a couple of drama practices, where he is teaching the youth one of the human dramas we did back in the States. The youth are doing a great job picking up on it and they hope to be bringing it to the streets in town very soon. I will for sure try and get a video of it!
Last Sunday Brian preached at a church in one of the villages right near us. It was so great to be back in a Africa church! Next weekend we will be heading to another church, where Brian will be preaching as well. We are also working a lot on our house, and hope to have it move in ready by the time we get home from language school, which is mid-May.
So there is a quick update on what we have been up to this past month. We are working on a newsletter right now, and hope to have it out in the next couple of days, and it will have more details about our home project, and more details and pictures of what we have been up to.  Thank you all so much for you love and continued prayers!

My {first) African Birthday

My birthday was a week ago, but I thought this post was better late than never. It is amazing for me to look back over the past few years, and remembering always thinking that my next birthday might be in Africa. Always wondering what it would be like, and what we would do. I just remember the morning of my birthday waking up and thinking, " I am in Africa." I felt so blessed that our time has come and we are here. On the same hand, I was a little bit sad because I knew the day would not be spent with our family and friends at home. I was a little unsure of what the day would hold. We woke up, got the kids ready and took them to school. After we had picked the girls up from school {Kayden stays a full day while the girls are only a half day right now} we went out to lunch to my favorite restaurant for pizza. Don't be fooled when I say pizza. :) It is good, but nothing at all like Pizza Hut! :) My dear friend here, Mary, had just delivered her third daughter via C-section earlier that morning, and her husband called me and asked if I would like to come up and see Mary and the baby as a birthday present. Um, of course! If you know me at all, you know I have an extreme weakness for babies, especially little newborns. It was so nice to get to see Mary and meet sweet Naomi. It was also very interesting, and a little sad, to experience my first trip to an African hospital.

Once I was home from the hospital it was time to head over to our friends house for dinner with them. I had already guessed by then that Brian was throwing me one of his "surprise" parties { I am pretty sure he has thrown me one every year since we have been married :) } and sure enough it was.

It was a great night with our new community of friends. Of course my fun loving husband had some games planned that were fun for everyone.

Brian had even picked me up cake from a bakery in town.

 It was a great night and I left feeling so blessed for so many reasons. It is still so surreal to me sometimes that we are actually here. I have spent the last seven years of my life wondering when it would be, and it is here. God has been so good and faithful to our family, it honestly blows my mind. This past month has been the hardest time of my life, and yet at the same  time some of the best and most precious times of my life. I will be posting next time about what we have been up to this last month, and how I have personally seen God's amazing grace overflowing in my life. Love from the whole Loudermilk crew to YOU!

{New world, same Brian}

Tonight I made my first meal on my own in Africa. Mac'n'cheese. I know, I know.... you are super impressed right?! :) Well, I was! The kids and Brian really enjoyed it, but I did not really like it. The cheddar cheese here tastes so different, a lot sharper or something. So I just fed them and didn't eat. Well, Brian was going to lock up our home {it is open during the day for the workers to come in and out} and I knew he would be right my favorite restaurant with my favorite meal here. So I asked him ever so sweetly if he would mind stopping and picking it up for me, kind of like a belated birthday present. Of course he agreed. When he walked in from locking up with my food and Coke in hand, I burst out laughing with the thought of how even though we are on the opposite side of the world from our home, some things will never change. Brian is just as amazing of a husband on this continent as he was on the last. Thanks Bri, I love you so much!

{Honestly}

uI feel like it is important for me to write this post. I hope you find it as an open and honest look into my life right now, and a source of encouragement in some way. I can't wait to look back on it in the near future and see how far God has brought me.
We have been in Africa about a week and half now, but it seems like so much longer. It seems so long ago that we were with our friends in the States, in the freezing cold Iowa weather. It seems like forever ago we were at the airport with our loved ones saying goodbye. It has been a much harder transition than I was prepared for. Sure, you have everyone telling you what it is going to be like, and you know hard times full of emotions are coming, but until you walk it out, you have no idea. I have never experienced such sorrow or felt such loss before in my life. It is as though a literal death has occurred, a death of our old lives back in the States. During the day here I do well. We keep busy and honestly with the four kids there is not much time to stop and think. At night though, it is a different story. As I sit in our room while our babies sleep, I become overwhelmed with emotions. I miss our family and friends so deeply it has physically hurt my heart. I want to run away, and run home to the only life we ever knew as a family, living near family and serving at our home church surrounded by our church family. I have questioned God, was this a mistake? We have nothing in the States to go home to. No home, no car, no furniture, no jobs. Did we give that all up to come here and just survive? I want to thrive, not just survive! In my heart though, I know without a doubt we are here for a reason, even if I don't like admitting it. I know we have been called here, and looking back over the last year and remembering all the miracles that got us here, could never deny that. I have been reminded many times of a night back home when we were praying with our dear friends Josh and Alissa, and Josh said he felt like we needed to pray for the hard times. He was telling us he felt like there would be hard times to come but we can do all things through God in us. So that night he prayed for us about that and I have looked back on it and it has been a great source of strength.
I have known since the first night here I was not embracing this call on our lives. I have been stiff arming the call and our lives here since I got here. It scares me when I think about embracing the call and being ok, and beginning our lives here, because in reality that means being ok with giving up our lives in the States. God has been speaking to me though, even just this morning. He has been using our friends here to assure me that all these feelings are normal. This morning, as hard as it was for me to say I did tell God, I accept this. I KNOW you have our family here for a reason. Even though I miss our family and friends, and ministries back in the States terribly, I submit to what you have for us here. I don't want to be here and not be used. I don't want to wallow in my sorrow any longer. It is not a fun or healthy place to be. I trust that even a couple months from now I will look back at this time I my life and say Praise God for bringing me through that tough time!

Psalm 9:9-10 "The Lord also will be a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in time of trouble, and those who know thy name will put their trust in thee; for thou oh Lord, has not forsaken those who seek Him."

Romans 8:18 "For I consider that the suffering of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us."

Matthew 11:28-30 "Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you shall find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy, and My load is light."


I know as our home gets finished and we get accustomed to life here, things will start feeling more normal. There is so much culture shock still going on daily. Driving here is crazy, and we actually got in a minor car accident the other day while Brian was driving. We saw favor even in that situation though, as there was no damage on the car that hit us {even though the accident was our fault}, and the man was only concerned that we were ok and didn't even want to exchange phone numbers or anything. Our friend told us that is not common at all! We have some minimum damage on our car, but nothing that cannot be fixed.
Funny story about things that happen here and we laugh about later. The other night Brian got home from basketball with some other missionary men and it was about 11 at night. We were having a serious conversation as I was upset and missing home, and praying together. All of a sudden it sounded like someone threw a baseball as hard as they could right at us in our guest house we are staying in. It startled both Brian and I very much and we both became very nervous, as no one else should have been on the property at night. Brian jumped up and grabbed his knife and called Peter {our friend we are staying with right now} to see what he should do. Then I got a text from Mary {Peter's wife} saying a mango had just fallen on our roof and that was the sound. Brian and I got a good laugh about it. Small things that if you don't know can startle you, but then once explained are no big deal. I have a lot of those stories.  :) :)
Well... if you made it through this entire post GOOD JOB! We love you all and are so thankful for your prayers and encouragement! Much love from Tanzania!!